Simon

A poor enough fellow is Simon though he owns a half acre block
On hill off of Cape Paterson coast road about two miles from Inverloch
His block has a for sale sign on it for he can't afford to build there
He needs every dollar he can get since he has to live on welfare.

His ex wife claimed their house when they split up 'twas given to her by the court
And she has to raise their three children she can't look to him for support
And he got the block by the ocean the block that he now has for sale
Don't ask Simon how he is feeling for he'll give you the sorriest tale.

Poor Simon for himself feels sorry and if you ask him how he feel
He will tell you how life is a bugger and has given him the rawest deal
And he'll complain of his ex wife Miranda and all that she has put him through
To him she's the World's worst person and he refers to her as the shrew.

But Simon he will never tell you how he beat his kids and his wife
And how they are better off without him and enjoy a happier life
Or of how he drank the most of his wages, No he won't tell you of his shame
And he has found himself a scapegoat Miranda his ex wife he blame.

Since the factory he worked in doors were closed he is in need of every cent
And for his one bedroom flat in Bayswater he struggles just to pay the rent
He bemoans his lack of good fortune and he says life to him is unfair
And he feels he is on the scrapheap condemned to a life on welfare.

If you ask Simon how his life is his bad fortune he will bewail
And of how his half acre block in South Gippsland he has offered for sale
And he will blame his ex wife Miranda for all the hard times he's been through
But that his problems are of his own making is one thing he won't tell you.